You Can’t Compare Your Chapter 5 to Their Chapter 50

Recently, someone told me something that truly stuck: “You can’t compare your chapter 5 to their chapter 50.” As a young mom with a large family, that hit home.

It’s so easy to look around and see what other families have—the finished homes, the paid-off vehicles, the dream vacations, the freedom in their schedules. Especially when you’re in your 20s or 30s, raising kids, juggling daycare costs, groceries, sports fees, and trying to contribute to retirement at the same time. It can feel like you’re working so hard… and still so far behind.

But here’s the truth: many of the people we’re comparing ourselves to have simply been in the game longer.

Wealth Takes Time

Most financially secure couples didn’t build their life overnight. They:

  • Lived through starter homes

  • Drove used cars

  • Said “no” to trips

  • Budgeted tightly

  • Invested consistently

  • Made sacrifices no one saw

Time is one of the greatest wealth-building tools we have. Compound interest doesn’t just work on money—it works on habits, discipline, and patience.

When you’re 30, you’re often:

  • Paying off student loans

  • Growing your career

  • Raising babies

  • Building your emergency fund

  • Contributing what you can to retirement

That’s not behind. That’s building.

The Comparison Trap

Comparison is dangerous financially. When we try to “keep up” with someone in their chapter 50, it can lead to:

  • Overspending

  • Lifestyle inflation

  • Credit card debt

  • Resentment

  • Discouragement

We see their finished product but not the decades of decisions that got them there. And here’s something important: sometimes we’re not even comparing ourselves to their reality—we’re comparing ourselves to their highlight reel.

Staying the Course

As a big family, there are so many things we would love to do right now. Bigger trips. Buy a bigger house. Have more “extras.” But we also know that staying disciplined today builds freedom tomorrow.

We don’t need chapter 50 right now. We need consistency in Chapter 5.

That means:

  • Living within our means

  • Investing steadily

  • Teaching our kids healthy money habits

  • Choosing long-term peace over short-term pressure

If we stay on the path—budgeting, saving, investing, and being intentional—we will reach our own chapter 50 in time.

And when we do, it won’t be because we rushed it. It will be because we respected the process.

Your Timeline Is Yours

If you’re in your early wealth-building years, give yourself grace.

You are not behind.

You are not failing.

You are building.

Every dollar saved.

Every debt paid down.

Every investment made.

Every “no” that protects your future.

That’s progress.

Chapter 5 isn’t supposed to look like Chapter 50.

But if you stay faithful to the plan, one day you’ll look back and realize—you wrote a beautiful story of your own.

At KerberRose, we understand that everyone’s financial journey looks different. Whether you’re just getting started or looking to strengthen your plan, we’re here to help you build your story with confidence.

Contact me or our team today to start turning your Chapter 5 into the foundation of your Chapter 50.

 

About the Author

Alex is a Retirement Plan Associate on our Wealth Management team. She is a mom of four, and her passion is sharing her own personal finance journey from living paycheck to paycheck and drowning in debt to finding financial peace. Alex's unique experience has given her the ability to help families take control of their own personal finances - all while still enjoying what life has to offer.

Contact: alex.miller@kerberrose.com

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